Peering Over The Edge of No Return

I love my mother. If it hasn’t come through on this blog already, today I say it plainly. There is no woman I think is more fabulous, more fun, funnier, more beautiful than she is. When we talk on the phone, it’s rarely ever less than an hour, often closer to two. When I actually go home, we spend whole days talking and hanging out. No conversation ends without me saying “Love you mum!”. It’s a good thing I’m gay because no woman would ever be able to compete with her (no, seriously). There are very few weeks that pass without me receiving such picture messages as this one from her:

I walking to a meeting a few days ago when I received a text message. It was from my mum and I hurriedly opened it to get an unexpected surprise. It was a forwarded message supporting the anti-gay bill in Nigeria and urging all recipients to support this bill and not bow down to western or other influences which seek to quash the bill. It ended by suggesting all recipients should send the message to others to show their support for the bill.

 

A Near Virgin Suicide

When I started this blog, there were three things I wanted to write about. I just managed to talk about one. Some of these things have been kept inside for such a long time that now that I can talk about them, I can’t find the words to do so. At such times I wish I had the writing skill that Clare Flourish and Ricky possess. They have a way of talking about their experiences in such a frank, real, human way that I sometimes feel as if I’m a part of it. I have started this post many times and I still cannot include many things because I’m not ready to talk about them, even to myself.

 

If It Doesn’t Destroy You…

source: http://www.meloveletters.com

Years ago my mother asked me if her working so hard when we were young was worth it. It was a very unusual question because she isn’t someone who doubts herself very often and when she did, she generally wouldn’t come to me. I told her then that her sacrifice was worth it but I was lying. The truth is that back then I didn’t know. Growing up, both my parents worked super hard to take care of my siblings and I.  A lot of the things they had to do wasn’t apparent back then but with the eyes of an adult, I see how hard it must have been for them and I love them even more. One of the reasons I couldn’t give her an honest response was because I went through an experience as a child that no one should ever go through.

 

Countdown

My mother and I are quite close and we talk at least once a week, usually for an hour or close to it. So a few days ago I was getting ready to go to a friend’s for lunch when I got a call from her. After going through the recent family gossip (where family includes extended family so this part of the conversation took awhile) we came to the subject of why I’m still not married. I told her I’m not ready for anything that serious and I’d like to focus on my work for now. She said she understood but that I ‘needed’ to be married in two years time. I guess two years are my time limit to telling her the truth since I don’t see myself marrying a woman within this period. On another note does anyone ever need to get married?